1. Water Shoes: Because the Adriatic is Trying to Kill Your Feet
You’ve seen the photos. Crystal-clear turquoise water, sun bouncing off the Adriatic, looking so inviting you’d think it was designed in a lab for Instagram. And yet, the moment you try to wade in barefoot, reality punches you in the feet.
Because here’s the thing: Istria’s beaches aren’t sandy. They’re pebbly. Or rocky. Or concrete slabs pretending to be beaches. So instead of gracefully walking into the water like a movie star, you’ll find yourself hopping, limping, and swearing under your breath while locals—who came prepared—watch in amusement.
And just when you think “I’ll tough it out”, you’ll meet sea urchins. Yes, actual spiky creatures that sit at the bottom, waiting for unsuspecting tourists to step on them. They won’t kill you, but they will ruin your day and leave you limping to the nearest pharmacy, where a local will sigh and mutter, “Another one.”
The solution? Water shoes. They cost a few euros and will save you from both pain and embarrassment. Bring them, wear them, and enjoy the sea like a pro—while watching barefoot tourists suffer for their mistakes.
2. Tap Water is Safe. But That’s Not the Point.
Unlike in some countries, where drinking tap water is basically an extreme sport, Istria’s tap water is perfectly safe. No weird aftertaste, no risk of stomach trauma, just good, clean water straight from the faucet.
And yet—no one drinks it.
Order tap water in a restaurant, and you’ll get the same look a sommelier would give you if you asked for a bottle of their finest ketchup. Locals don’t do it. Not because the water is bad, but because… bottled water is just “better.” No one can really explain why, but it’s a deeply ingrained cultural habit. You’ll see locals walking around with huge bottles of Jana or Jamnica like their life depends on it, and they will pay for it at a restaurant even though free tap water is sitting right there.
So what should you drink instead? Anything but water. Seriously, you’re in Istria—order wine, beer, or Radler (that glorious half-beer, half-lemonade hybrid that refreshes like no other). They cost about the same as bottled water, but are infinitely more enjoyable.
Drink like a local. And if you must hydrate, do it in secret.
3. ATMs Are Scams in Disguise. Here’s How to Beat Them.
Picture this: you’re in a charming Istrian town, you need cash, and—conveniently—there’s an ATM right in front of you. You insert your card, tap a few buttons, and suddenly, it asks you if you want to accept their “guaranteed conversion rate.” What it doesn’t say is that this “rate” is about as fair as a casino in Vegas.
Congratulations, you’ve just been invited to donate an absurd amount of money to an international banking overlord.
You see, not all ATMs in Croatia are created equal. The ones belonging to actual banks (PBZ, Erste, Zagrebačka Banka) are fair. The ones from Euronet or any random-looking machine next to a souvenir shop? Those are daylight robbery in machine form. They lure in tourists and charge them fees so high you’d think you were withdrawing gold bars, not euros.
But here’s the trick: you can avoid all of this entirely. Instead of withdrawing cash, just pay directly with your card. Most restaurants, bars, and shops accept cards, and—get this—the fees for paying by card are usually much lower than the ATM’s ransom rates. The only places that might insist on cash are tiny konobas, market stalls, and that one mysterious guy selling truffles from the trunk of his car.
So, repeat after me: Use a bank ATM if you must, never accept the “conversion rate,” and when possible—just tap your card and move on. More money for wine, less money for evil banking cartels.
4. Parking is a Blood Sport, and You’re Already Losing
Parking in Istria is not an activity. It’s a test of endurance, patience, and sheer luck. A gladiatorial battle between you and every other driver who has just realized there are exactly three parking spots in the entire town, and all of them were taken in 1997.
Let’s break it down.
First, you have the old town streets. These were designed centuries before the concept of cars even existed. They are so narrow that if you open your car door, you might simultaneously hit a wall, a souvenir stand, and an old lady selling lavender. And yet, some lunatics still try to drive through them. You will see it happen. You will laugh. And then you will pray that person isn’t you.
Then, there’s the parking “lots”—I use that term loosely, because most of them are just patches of gravel where cars are crammed in at angles that defy physics. You might find a spot, but getting out? Good luck. You now live there. This is your life now.
And finally, we have beach parking. Oh, you thought driving to the beach would be easy? Think again. Everyone who has ever visited Istria had the same idea and got there before you. The result? A long, desperate drive along the coast where you will eventually park somewhere questionable and pray no one notices.
Solutions?
– Don’t even think about driving into an old town. Park outside and walk. Your sanity will thank you.
– If you see a spot, take it. Don’t hesitate. Don’t think, “Maybe there’s something closer.” There isn’t.
– Rent a small car. If you bring an SUV, you better enjoy three-point turns in medieval alleys.
– Prepare to pay. If it’s a paid lot, take it. It’s cheaper than the therapy session you’ll need after trying to find free parking.
So there you go. Parking in Istria is not for the weak. It’s survival of the fittest. And if you manage to find a spot without reversing into a historical monument, congratulations—you’ve won.
5. Restaurants Move at the Speed of a Glacier, and That’s Normal.
If you’re used to eating out in a country where waiters bring the check before you’ve even finished chewing, you’re in for a surprise. Istrian restaurants operate on a different timeline—one that makes tectonic plate movement look hasty.
Here’s how it works: You sit down. You order. The food arrives eventually, and then—the waiters disappear into another dimension. You will not be rushed. You will not be asked, “Is everything okay?” every 45 seconds. And you absolutely will not get the bill unless you hunt someone down like a detective chasing leads on a cold case.
And before you think this is bad service—nope. It’s just how things are done. Meals in Istria aren’t just about eating; they’re about existing, marinating in conversation, sipping wine like a Roman emperor, and enjoying life at a pace that makes sense.
But if you’re on a schedule? Good luck. You could probably file your taxes, renew your passport, and learn a new language before your check magically appears. The solution? When you’re ready to go, wave down your waiter and ask for the bill. If you don’t, you might still be sitting there when breakfast service starts.
6. Uber is a Myth, and Taxis Hunt in Packs
Ah, Uber in Istria. Yes, it technically exists. The app opens, the interface looks familiar, and for a brief moment, you feel safe. And then—nothing. No cars available. No estimated arrival time. Just an empty void, where a working Uber should be. Welcome to the wilderness.
Now, you’re in taxi territory. And taxis in Istria? They can smell fear. The moment they sense you have no other way home, their prices go up faster than a fuel crisis. No meter? Oh, what a coincidence, it’s “broken.” A ride that should cost €10? Try €30, maybe more if you look particularly stranded.
They also have a unique approach to navigation. The scenic route? You’re taking it. Even if your destination is literally around the corner, prepare for a magical mystery tour of places you never needed to see.
So, what’s the solution?
– If you can, book Uber while it’s still daylight.
– If you must take a taxi, negotiate the price before getting in.
– If you want to avoid this entire situation, rent a car.
Because waiting for Uber in Istria is like waiting for a dragon to show up and fly you home. And getting into a taxi without a pre-agreed price? That’s just volunteering for a financial mugging.
7. Public Toilets Are a Rare and Highly Guarded Luxury
Need to use the bathroom while exploring Istria? Good luck, my friend. Public toilets here are about as common as an honest politician—they exist, technically, but finding one is a quest of epic proportions.
And let’s say, by some miracle, you do find one. Fantastic! Except—it’s locked. And if it’s not locked? You’ll need to pay. Yes, that’s right. Basic human rights, now available for a small fee. Because nothing adds excitement to a full bladder quite like frantically searching your pockets for a few coins.
But wait, it gets better. Some places only accept exact change. So if all you have is a €50 bill? Congratulations, you’re now the proud owner of a very expensive bathroom trip.
Now, you could try the “beach strategy”—run into the sea and pretend you’re “just cooling off” (we all know what’s happening). But for those who prefer a more civilized approach, here’s the ultimate hack:
Walk into a bar.
Order the cheapest drink available
Use their toilet like you own the place.
Not only do you get to relieve yourself for less than the price of a public toilet, but now you also have a refreshing beer, coffee, or Radler in hand. Absolute genius.
So there you have it. Public toilets are rare. They cost money. They may or may not be locked. Your best bet? Outsmart the system and turn every bathroom trip into a free drink opportunity. Cheers to that.
8. Siesta: The Istrian Disappearing Act
You’re wandering through a charming Istrian town, the sun is shining, you’ve just finished lunch, and suddenly—everything is closed. Shops? Shuttered. Bakeries? Deserted. Pharmacies? Gone, like they were never there.
Welcome to siesta time, a daily ritual where the entire country collectively decides, “Nah, we’ll deal with that later.” Officially, it’s a midday break, but good luck figuring out the exact hours because it varies wildly from place to place. Some shops reopen at 4 PM. Others? Whenever the owner feels like it.
Now, if you’re a tourist with a tight schedule and the expectation that businesses should be open during business hours, this will drive you insane. Need sunscreen? Come back later. Fancy a pastry? Not now, you don’t. Looking for a souvenir? Try again after 5 PM, maybe.
The only exception? Restaurants and bars. Because even during siesta, one thing remains sacred—drinking coffee and discussing the meaning of life for three hours.
The solution? Plan your shopping and errands before lunch or be prepared to stare into locked doors, questioning your life choices.
9. Mosquitoes Are Out for Blood (And It’s Yours)
Ah, Istria. Land of stunning coastlines, breathtaking sunsets, and mosquitoes that should be classified as weapons of war.
These little demons appear the moment the sun dips below the horizon, and unlike the laid-back Istrian lifestyle, they are aggressively efficient. They don’t just bite. They devour. You? You’re not a person. You’re an all-you-can-eat buffet, and the entire mosquito population has RSVP’d.
And here’s the kicker: they don’t care about fancy repellents. Spray yourself in chemicals all you want—they’ll still find that one spot you missed. Citronella candles? They laugh in the face of citronella candles.
Locals, of course, have adapted. They’ve built an unspoken resistance, or maybe they’ve just accepted their fate. Either way, they don’t seem to suffer as much.
Your best chance of survival?
– Douse yourself in repellent like you’re marinating for a BBQ.
– Sit inside after sunset unless you enjoy scratching yourself into oblivion.
– Mentally prepare for battle, because you will lose.
Welcome to Istria. Hope you brought anti-itch cream.
10. Tourist Trains Are a Scam. Rent a Bike Instead.
You’ve seen them. Those cute, colorful tourist trains chugging through town, packed with unsuspecting travelers who think they’re about to get a charming guided tour. What they don’t realize? They’ve just paid an outrageous amount of money to move slightly faster than walking speed.
Tourist trains in Istria don’t really take you anywhere useful. They loop around the most predictable parts of town at a speed so slow you could crawl alongside it. And once you realize this, you’re trapped. You can’t get off. You must endure.
Now, if you’re five years old, fine. Maybe this is thrilling. But if you have fully functioning legs, there’s a better way to explore—Istria is perfect for cycling.
If rent a bike instead?
– You can actually control where you go.
– You won’t be overcharged for a glorified parade float.
– You get to see the countryside properly instead of watching it creep by at a snail’s pace.
So do yourself a favor—skip the train, get on a bike, and feel like you’re actually moving. Unless, of course, you enjoy paying to experience what it’s like to be in a traffic jam without the traffic.
—
And there you have it—the brutally honest guide to Istria. You now know that the sea is stunning but out to destroy your feet, taxis will financially ruin you, ATMs are legal scams, parking is an extreme sport, and public toilets operate on a “pay to play” model.
You also know that if you want to eat at a restaurant, you’ll need three hours and the patience of a monk, siesta time will catch you off guard, and mosquitoes don’t just bite, they plan coordinated attacks. And if you ever find yourself considering a tourist train, slap yourself and rent a bike instead.
But here’s the thing—Istria is worth every single one of these quirks. The beaches, the towns, the food, the history—it’s one of the most beautiful places you’ll ever visit. And now, unlike the poor souls wandering around barefoot and overpaying for taxis, you are prepared.
And if you’re looking for a place that lets you explore all of this madness while still having a calm, comfortable home base, Petite Miranda Apartments is exactly where you want to be.
– Centrally located so you don’t have to sleep in your car while looking for parking.
– Close to the beaches (just bring those water shoes).
– Easy access to restaurants, but with a kitchen in case waiting three hours for the bill isn’t your thing.
– A place to relax after battling mosquitoes, ATM fees, and medieval alleyways.
– And best of all, free parking just for you!
So, now that you know exactly what to expect, go forth and explore Istria the right way—prepared, slightly amused, and without falling for a single tourist trap.
And when you need the perfect place to stay? You know where to find us.
